Paul McCartney has been in the news recently because he sang the Beatles hit “I Want to Hold Your Hand” at Taylor Swift’s wedding to Travis Kelce. Apparently, he had not sung the song to an audience since the early 1960s.
Once that song was stuck in our heads, it was a quick leap to another Beatles classic—one that reminded us of an important truth about mental health. Here are the lyrics to the intro, the first verse, and the chorus of “Help!”
(Help!) I need somebody
(Help!) Not just anybody
(Help!) You know I need someone
(Help!)
(When, when I was young) When I was younger, so much younger than today
(I never need) I never needed anybody’s help in any way
(Now these days are gone) But now these days are gone, I’m not so self-assured
(And now I find) Now I find I’ve changed my mind and opened up the doors
Help me if you can, I’m feeling down
And I do appreciate you being ’round
Help me get my feet back on the ground
Won’t you please, please, help me?
The Beatles make asking for help sound easy (and catchy!). But for many people—perhaps including you—it can be very difficult to admit they need help. Let’s take a look at why that might be and what can be done about it.
Obstacles to Asking for Help
Most of us want to believe that we can manage whatever life throws at us without needing help from anyone. Of course, that is seldom true. Everyone needs help of one kind or another. But even when someone is struggling with a mental health issue, they may be reluctant to seek out help. Here are some reasons why:
- Embarrassment and fear of judgment: When you want to be self-reliant (and most everyone does), it can feel embarrassing to ask for help. And that sense of embarrassment can be grounded in a belief that you will be judged harshly by anyone you reach out to. Unfortunately, that feeling can arise due to the ongoing societal stigma around mental health.
- Not wanting to be a burden to others: Even if you can convince yourself that people will be kind if you reach out for aid, you might be worried about becoming a burden to someone else. After all, everyone has their own problems and concerns, right? You might feel as though you have an obligation to keep your difficulties to yourself.
- Uncertainty about what help might entail: Even when a person is experiencing problems related to a mental health disorder, they might have questions about how to get help and what that help might involve. In fact, a person might worry that any help they might receive might be worse in some way than the issue they are currently facing. The old idiom “the cure is worse than the disease” captures this idea.
So, what should you do if you are thinking about asking for help but are dealing with one of those concerns like those above? We have some ideas.
Clearing the Way to the Help You Need
Asking for help when you are dealing with an issue related to your mental health can be easier if you try some of these simple strategies:
- Consider writing your concerns down first: When you are feeling intimidated about asking another person for help, you might find it easier to start by writing your feelings down. You are not writing for an audience, so you can freely express your feelings and thoughts.
- Choose a person you trust: Asking for help is easier if you reach out to someone you truly trust. That person could be a family member, a close friend, or a coworker.
- Start small and be honest: You do not have to sit someone down and tell them all your worries and troubles at once. Simply letting someone know you are struggling is a good start. You might even start with a note—an email, a text, a handwritten note. If you started by writing your thoughts down, you may be able to use some of that language in a note to someone you trust.
- Reach out to a professional or a crisis organization: In some cases—either because you just do not feel comfortable talking with someone you know or because you have reached a point where trained intervention is necessary—you may want to seek help from a mental health provider right away. In a crisis, you may want to call the Suicide & Crisis Line at 988.
You Can Always Start With Us
Peak View Behavioral Health, located in Colorado Springs, Colorado, offers evidence-based, personalized care for a variety of mental health disorders including depression, anxiety or panic issues, and difficulties grounded in traumatic experiences. We rely on our high levels of expertise, years of experience, and spirit of empathy to offer the best care.
We are well aware that asking for help can be challenging. You can rely on Peak View Behavioral Health to help you renew balance in your life so that you can embrace hope for your future again. You will never be judged while getting help at Peak View. We understand mental health disorders, and we are ready to help you.
